Stefan – Serve Conscious

Final Installment: The Unexpectedly Inspiring Hard Truths of Service – You Don’t Deserve Better | Ep. 51

Self-worth is not a function of how much you think you deserve. Shed this old conditioning, hack feelings of non-acceptance and take your service game to the next level. Final part in a series to help you develop strength, grit and self-sufficiency by reconciling with the tough realities of service life.

It’s the podcast’s 50th episode anniversary so I am discussing principles to take your service mindset to the next level – and it involves a starting from an open, unbiased perspective. The Zen principle of “The Beginner’s Mind” involves a sort of “wise innocence” that allows maximum readiness, learning and growth from any given moment without abandoning all the knowledge and skill you’ve developed over the years.

Understand what power truly is and how service is the perfect place to cultivate it. However, really tapping into its transformative power requires more humility than we are usually willing.

Make a habit of the “internal yes” in order to learn how to thrive in situations we can’t control, predict or get the results we want. After all, self-discovery happens when we don’t get our own way.

Never feel deficient when someone reacts negatively to something you said or did by implementing a simple understanding of personal responsibility. Be caring and considerate from a free and empowered, not one where you feel shackled and obligated.

The customer is always right…and so are you (if you’re present, attentive, and truly serving). But you’re never right if you have something to prove. Learn how to let go of the beliefs that are holding you back from truly connecting to the people you serve.

My reflections on my fascinating discussion with Kelsey Mathes in the most recent interview episode “Ego-Driven Fear, Self-Transformation, Empowered Work…and Other Barroom Chat – Interview w/ Kelsey Mathes.”

Big doses of wisdom and inspiration from Kelsey’s journey from hospitality professional to meditation teacher and transformational coach. Learn to live with care and purpose…without the drama.

The untold power of gratitude – how to make every moment an opportunity for something that feeds you with inspiration, growth, self-understanding and tools for being even more of service.

Have a non-attached relationship to your expectations of the people your serve, while avoiding indifference and maintaining your preferences, priorities and principles.

A short episode reflecting on my fascinating discussion with Wu De – key points applied to the challenges and opportunities of service life.

The Zen Way of Tea: reconnect with your natural intuitive wisdom, master yourself while remaining fluid, free and accepting – and learn how to truly serve.

Learn to create your own opportunities and relationships that serve your growth and success better than anything someone you’re hoping to “network with” can offer you. Be your own source of self-worth and break dependency on others for validation.

Cultivate the warrior-like resilience that service demands. This means coming to terms with some hard truths of life as a human being. And learning the tools to hack what seems like a grim reality.

Bartender turned life coach discusses the importance of not defining your worth by self-sacrifice and grind – find a path that truly inspires you.

How I learned that service isn’t just for work. Everything in life can be defined on those terms. And must be questioned: Is it a worthy input of energy? Am I doing it skillfully such that I am really serving the best parts of myself and others?

Catherine Sherlock is going against the grain to deepen the power of mindfulness training on the organizational level.

Ask me about how to be confident and you will get more than you bargained for.

Discussion that looks at mindfulness, emotional intelligence, monotasking, caregiving and hospitality principles that work in any setting.

Yoga & meditation are not just meant to be an isolated, but a practice you bring into everything – including, especially, any kind of work. I discuss an ancient practice that allows you to meet any challenge with enthusiasm, inspiration and wisdom.

Conversation with Rebecca Shafir, speech pathologist, mindful communication and business coach and author of Zen of Listening (a very important book for me). We discuss communication techniques, pitfalls and mindful living.

The life-upgrading power of Mindful Ninja Moves transcribed as a weekly review with links to Serve Conscious articles, guides and podcast episodes that take you deeper into the techniques and wisdom they propose.

Host of the Innerbloom AND Positive Head Podcast Alexa Houser discusses her story, EFT healing practice and mission to help the world transcend its issues…by processing hers along with them.

We look at an emotional mastery system that allows you to work with your most “unwanted” emotions to master yourself, live mindfully and be an absolute service Jedi.

Rachael Kable’s mission is educate the world on simple, practical and methodical ways of incorporating mindfulness into every aspect of your life. She tells her story and discusses how mindfulness helps harness the potential of emotional sensitivity. 

Industry-leader Dushan Zaric discusses the responsibility we have to serve with care and presence; powerful insights forged from a life of passion, deep self-exploration and hardship.

Founder & CEO of JoJo tea discusses tea as a spiritual practice and a spiritual livelihood…as well as a wide range of other principles that can facilitate a life of integrity and inspiration – from acting, to breathing, to remaining humble.

Founder/Host of The Meaning Movement discusses work as a journey towards finding meaning…and the balance we need to find between generating a livelihood and living our mission.

I try to not be a hypocrite while teaching about the power of listening by speaking uninterrupted for over an hour. I discuss how challenges you experience in listening actually come from a disconnection from yourself.

The conclusion of our wonderful discussion about life, the spiritual journey and all the silliness and hardship we need to embrace along the way.

This article stands alone, but also serves as an extension of themes discussed in of part I. The Case of the Two-Faced Server. One of the most prominent bits of restaurant industry lore concerns an idea that the servers that are the most gracious, sweet and beloved by their guests are the vile once they […]

Funny, insightful and super real discussion with Cory Hardaker, a meditation and martial arts teacher and host of the Mindfulness of Doom podcast

I discuss my present situation and share stories and cases that reveal how you’re always growing and evolving…even (sometimes especially) when you’re “going backwards” .

We discuss mindful journaling and other conscious reflection techniques, slowing down and having hobbies…real ones.

Discussion on the art of mindful conflict resolution. The Yogic path of self-understanding meets mediation in powerful ways.

Self-development coach David Tian and I discuss the ways we live in contradiction to our “higher values”…and the power that space has to instruct and expand who we are.

Interview with Greg Clowminzer about mindful communication, understanding the nature of thought and the self-knowledge you acquire from seeing through it.

Humanity as the new spirituality! Talk with Jonni Pollard about his book The Golden Sequence, a total guide to conscious living as a participant in society. Self-development is worth much unless you’re of service!

An interview with the co-founder of the KYO App discussing the power of journaling and asking yourself the right questions to improve your life

Master identifying needs, get what you want through compassion, and break the subtle conditioning that keeps us from communicating honestly.

At any moment we have the power to initiate a teacher-student dynamic. Discusses the important and delicate nuances of this dynamic and how to respect them.

Powerful Ways The Service Environment Reveals & Tests Our Ability to Be Our Authentic Selves Probably the most played out bit of wisdom we get from people of all positions and disciplines is encouragement to “just be you” rather than whatever you think people expect of you. It’s something we always do well to be […]

Mastering Something Means Mastering Your Need For Instant Gratification | Ep. 12

How to master skills, which then shape us into people that are even more awesome. Reveals the value of sticking with something especially when it gets boring and repetitive.

Originally written for the Be Here Now Network. Check out the original article here. “We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.” -T.S. Eliot It’s many years ago, and a much younger Stefan is in the […]

Searching For Significance: Serving Means Directing People To Their Highest Selves | Ep. 11

Skillful ways of speaking to the highest place in people without seeming manipulative. People are awesome and it’s in your best interest to discover that.

Service That Connects When It Could Divide: Interview w/ Angie Vroom | Ep. 10

Conversation with meditation teacher Angie Vroom on the crucial marriage of spirituality with activism, social justice and critical thinking.

Being Your True Self Is Not What You Think It Is: Interview w/ David Tian | Ep. 09

Discussion with self-development coach David Tian about being yourself…and the surprising ways that really being yourself means being focused beyond it.

The most recent Serve Conscious podcast episode was about living with an abundance mentality. The concept might have seemed more controversial than I first considered and probably would have benefitted from a more thorough explanation of what it is and what it is not. In case there are fears that this idea conflicts with your […]

The Importance of an Abundance Mindset (Not Just On Thanksgiving) | Ep. 08

How to serve anything well through generosity – having a sense of endless resources and an enthusiasm for sharing them.

All Posts by Stefan